Sit Down

I made the most diet un-friendly food of my short life last week. 

Hold on.

Wait for it.

CANDIED BACON

Yes, that's right.  You heard me.  Candied Bacon.  Salty, crispy bacon coated in my own homemade table syrup and brown sugar.  Oh, shezam!

Homemade table syrup you ask?  I know, I know.  A sacrilege in the face of real maple syrup.  But desperate times called for desperate measures.  Here's a brief rundown on how to make the syrup:

If you can't read that bit of sixth grade axe murderer handwriting, do the following:

Boil 1 cup of water in the microwave
Add 2 cup of brown sugar and stir thoroughly
Cook on high in 2 minute intervals
After each interval, stir
Keep repeating until it boils again
Then boil hard for 1 minute
Let cool slightly and add 2 tsp of maple syrup flavouring

It keeps roughly forever.  In the refrigerator.
Be careful if you actually do this in the microwave (I usually do).  It can boil over in a heartbeat.  It can also become pretty thick if you aren't careful.  This is also easily done on the stove top, but what can I say?  I'm a purist.

Now, on to the main attraction!

Fry yourself up a nice pound of bacon.  If (read: when) I do this again, I will chop the bacon up into uniform pieces, probably about an inch or so long.  Fry it super duper crispy, but not burned.  'Cause that's just not healthy.

I'd say something like this, but maybe you prefer it a little less crunchy.  It's really up to you.

Keep this stuff.  It's a golden elixir.  For what?

Look at this stuff.  How can you ask me that?  For cooking, obviously!

Pour it into a nice canning jar - that way you are sure the glass can handle the heat of the bacon grease - and keep it in the fridge.  Again, it keeps roughly forever.  Another day, if you are very, very good, I will show you the many ways to use it.  Until then, you are just going to have to trust me.

Back to the bacon!  Not to be confused with back bacon.  Although that might be something to try  here, too.

Here's where you get creative. Toss in some brown sugar - about maybe a handful.  Drizzle over as much of the syrup as you feel you'd like to contribute.  To keep it simple this time, I didn't add any spices.  However, you could add cinnamon.  Or maybe some cardamom.  Or maybe something spicy, like some chili powder or cayenne.  Depends on your end game.

Here it is, all nice and lovely.  Make sure you have wiped as much of the grease out of the pan as possible and keep the heat no higher than medium.  Transfer it to its final container while it is still a little warm.  Otherwise, it will stick. Even to nonstick pans.  Don't ask me how I know

And there you have it.  I have seen it used a number of ways.  I am hoping to pair it with something chocolate this week.  If it lasts that long.

If not, it is absolutely addicting eaten out of hand.  Ours is being kept in the fridge right now, where it has actually collected a little moisture.  I am hazarding a guess that the chill chest probably isn't necessary and would actually result in a dryer, crisper product for longer.

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Sit Down

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